I took an 8 hour drive today. I think many people will recognize there are some things that happen to you when you spend too much time in the same position. When we got out of the car about 2/3rds of the way to our destination I felt so slow and heavy. Luckily we spent a few minutes strolling around a sculpture garden with some gigantic peacocks in the sun. That walking had the effect of clearing the boredom (for lack of a better word) from my body and mind and gave me a good shot at making the rest of the trip. I had illusions of going to the hotel’s fitness center and trying out some of the equipment, but I don’t have any appropriate clothes to wear. I’m here for work and I shortsightedly brought only what I needed. meh… I don’t like working out in public anyway.

So, What have we learned today? When you find yourself stuck in a position overlong, incorporate some movement: physical and mental if possible. think about something: have a conversation, read something, and walk around. Don’t just stand next to your car waiting to get back on your way. You’ll be more fresh when you arrive where you’re going. And nobody likes that not-so-fresh feeling.

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J.R. Worsley, who wrote the second sources referenced above, reopened the use of Chinese medicine for spiritual and emotional components of physical disease, which allowed for a truly holistic approach to medicine. The elements themselves are almost like code words for a broad classification of body parts, thought patterns, symptoms, feelings, and cycles we go through. The Disclaimer: The concepts and stereotypes found within are not to be used to prejudge anyone or their propensity for particular disorders of the body, mind, or choice.

There are 5 elements in this system: all things fall into one of the elements. More important to this concept is the movement from one element into another, but rarely will you find someone who has a true ability to explain the nuance of how they flow into one another. I certainly don’t have it, and I’ve seen perhaps one mysterious practitioner who appeared to, but they sure as hell weren’t giving up any trade secrets to me.

The 5 elements are: Fire, Earth, Metal, Water, Wood. This order is called the creative or generating cycle, think of it in a ring. So here we go - the natural essence of fire is to create ash, which is earth, earth moves and compresses and within forms metal ores, metal, in their stereotypical coolness condense water, and water naturally nourishes living things i.e. wood. There is also a controlling cycle, or consumptive cycle, it goes: wood controls earth (by sucking out its basic elements) earth controls water (think of dikes or the ocean giving way to the rising continents), water controls fire (kind of duh), fire controls metal (how do you manipulate metal? heat it up and bang on it), and metal controls wood (by chopping it down - take that wood!).

Here’s a very quick description of the essence of each element:

FIRE - fire is the expansive element, it grows out. It corresponds to the color red and heat and motion, and intangibility. it represents the part of your life when you’re dynamic and expanding your possibilities rather than paring them down. It’s closely tied to sex, and all things related to sex, except having kids, which is for later elements, but the sex part is fire.

EARTH - earth is the wholesome, nurturing provider. It ripens… you ripen.. the color is yellow and the property is dampness (don’t be confused yet.. just wait).. and it’s quite tangible.. somewhat more yielding than metal, but still… here’s where the babies come in. This is the pregnancy and child-rearing years.. this is having your entire raison d’etre be giving your children a roof over their head and food in their gullet.

METAL - metal is unyielding like I said. It’s contracting. It’s become time to prioritize what is really important because your options are being pared down by time. It’s associated with the color white, and it’s property is dryness. This is when you’re sad your kids are leaving home. perhaps.

WATER - water is the end of life and the beginning. The survival mode, keep it simple. having enough to survive is kind of a theme here. It’s withdrawn into the very seed of existence… starting to feel the esoteric bent of this philosophy here.. The color is black (no, not blue. think depths of the ocean). The property is coldness (again.. ocean = cold; muddy soil = damp)…

WOOD - wood is growing up, moving forward, very purposeful and direct. Think of an impetuous know-it-all ass, especially a teen-aged one. Too young to have any idea there’s a great deal of things they don’t know. Very comfortable assessing right vs. wrong. Color is green (or blue - i know.. the character in Chinese means both). The property is not coming to me at this moment. probably dispersing. how about that… I’ll just go with that for now.

This article is a broad introduction to these elements and concepts. As you may be able to see it will take quite a bit more explanation to make much use of them. In the coming weeks I’ll go through each element one at a time to give you more of the flavor and experience of it.

Ok… That’s enough of my precious time for now. I have more important things to do tonight, like unravel the intricacies of what makes my cats really want to sleep on the ironing board, and how it is that they know only one can sleep on it at a time, lest it fall over… without ever having caused it to fall over.

If you have questions or accolades, don’t hesitate to share them. critiques or factual corrections will not be tolerated.

Brett

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I dramatically cut the amount of meat that I ate in my diet to try and lower my cholesterol, but I found that I was hungry all the time. After a week or two of this I had to figure out how to add more food to my diet without adding too many calories.

I found the best way to keep full and not ruin your diet is to add A LOT of fruits and vegetables. Most vegetables are practically zero calories and fruits help with energy, so adding them in substitution for starches and meats is really helpful.

Here are some tips that I’ve found that helped me add more fruits and vegetables to my diet:

Buy your produce on a regular and more frequent schedule
When I first started trying to add more fruits and vegetables I found that I was over buying them in large quantities because I only went grocery shopping every couple weeks. The result was spoiled fruits and vegetables that I had to throw out. I’m going to the store at least once a week now.

Only buy as much as you will eat or less

Once you are visiting your local market more frequently it will be easier to manage how much you buy at one time, but at first just buy small quantities and see how much you finish.

Find what you like and start with that
Don’t force fruits and vegetables that you don’t like thinking that you’ll “learn to love it.” Buy what you know you like. You’ll eventually get sick of those and you’ll look for something else for variety, you may end up liking something you hate, but don’t start with it.

Prepare as much of your produce as possible as soon as you get home
I buy a lot of lettuce for salads. When I first started I would make my salads when I wanted them, but I found myself having less salad than I should have because I didn’t want to take the time to cut vegetables. Now when I get home I cut up everything ahead of time. I put the prepared salads in tupperware and they keep for longer than they would if they weren’t prepared.

Snack on fruit
When you are supplementing your diet or changing your diet there is a tendency to be hungry ALL THE TIME for the first week or month. The best thing you can do is to snack throughout the day. I’ve been using fruit for this because I don’t like fruit with my meals. Occasionally I’ll have some celery or carrots as snacks, but I find fruits to be more filling during the day.

Try to add a vegetables to every meal
You can add some sort of vegetable to every meal. Green beans, salad, etc. can go with just about anything.

Garnish vegetables with herbs, spices, and light oils or butter
Vegetables get really boring, at least I think so, but you can give them a lot more variety by adding some fresh herbs and spices.

Get it in juice form
Before I got serious about adding fruits and vegetables I used to get my daily allotment from V8 and Odwalla. I’m not saying that you should do this exclusively, but if you find that you aret getting enough fruits and vegetables right now and you don’t want to put any effort into adding them to your diet, juice is a good alternative.

Get a blender
This is the best thing I have ever done for my diet. I started with a juicer, but that just wasted a lot of fruit. With a blender you get to make smoothies with yogurt, berries, fruits, and juice. There are so many combinations you can try that you’ll never get bored using your blender to create delicious concoctions.

Get a food processor
I bought a blender-food processor combo thing, but having a food processor is great. I use it for salsa and making hummus.

Hopefully these tips will help to get you eating more fruits and vegetables on a regular basis.

Anthony

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A Remedy for the Tummy

The most common use I have for ginger root is to help calm an upset stomach. If you have a nauseas sensation or some spastic moments in the lower parts of the intestine, ginger can help you. Keep in mind here that this is not a substitute for the advice of your physician. I take the root and cut thin coins, about an eighth of an inch thick, and drop them into a mug of water. I generally use about 2 or 3 coins of ginger, then I heat it for a minute or so in the microwave. The broth should not taste too spicy, but should have a little kick to it. Later, as it steeps it’ll get very strong, so you may want to dilute it occasionally with some additional water if it gets too strong to stand the taste. Over the next few minutes (5-15) it should calm the stomach and move whatever is bothering you in a downward direction - such that it will end up in a toilet somewhere. Hopefully…

Preventing or Reducing the Symptoms of an Oncoming Cold

In the event that you have a nascent cold with the types early symptoms of an oncoming cold you’re going to get if you don’t do anything, ginger can also be very helpful. Maybe you have a mildly scratchy throat (not a severe sore throat, but just a little dry or uncomfortable because of mucous that may be draining down it), a little whininess, maybe a low grade fever, a strong desire not to work, but rather to sleep curled up on a chair in a quiet room, and tomorrow you have a full blown cold if you don’t take any action or overtire your body. When you start to feel the beginnings of these symptoms is the moment to take a slightly higher dose of ginger and sweat out the cold before it takes hold. I would use 6 or so of the coins from the previous recipe, and cook it much longer, around 4 to 5 minutes. The result will be a much more powerful ginger flavor, possibly to the point of irritating your tongue. This will cause you to sweat. The sweating should prompt you to drink some water, and be sure you do, if you know what’s good for you.

Taking Ginger Further

To go crazy overboard with this remedy, I recommend taking about 10 slices of the ginger of about the same thickness and boiling them in a medium pan of water for about 15 minutes. Then fill a bathtub with the hottest water you can stand. When the bath is full, dump in the ginger brew you made, then sit in the tub while drinking a separate mug of the remedy with 6 or so coins of ginger, and sweat like you’ve never sweated before. When you feel exhausted from it, it’s time to get out and dry off quickly (with no air blowing on you - *no hairdryers*) and wrap yourself tightly in a blanket and sleep for several hours…sweating the whole while. I recommend strategically placing a very large glass of water near the bed, because when you wake up you’ll be thirsty. When you wake up you’ll want to discard the sweaty blanket and get dressed. Keep taking care of yourself after this treatment, but you should now feel a lot better. Even if you don’t prevent an oncoming cold or reduce your symptoms, this treatment seems to shorten the duration of the cold when you do this early on. If it’s your third or second day into a full-blown cold, don’t do this treatment. There are better medicines once you hit that point. And of course keep drinking plenty of water.

On that note: there is no substitute for water. If I ever recommend water, I mean water, not juice, milk, coffee, tea, god forbid carbonated sugary beverages, or alcohol, or even vegetable juices. Just drink plain old water. When you feel better you can waste your energy on those other things…

A couple last words: there are many other uses of ginger in Chinese herbal medicine, but I found these to be the most useful. For more information consult your local library, or Chinese herbal medicine practitioner.

Brett

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When your liver is healthy it serves to keep your body and mind flowing smoothly. It facilitates the circulation of qi, stores the blood while you sleep, and is the home of the ethereal Soul, but I won’t get into that today.

When your liver is unhealthy it can lead to body pains, depression, anxiety, fits of rage, exhaustion, insomnia, alternating constipation and diarrhea, gas and distension of the abdomen, and for the girl-type readers out there all of the things you associate with PMS. For you guy-type readers out there, if you’ve ever found yourself to feel irrational and pissed off a lot, odds are good you have some malfunction of the liver.

Excess, in the form of too much sex, too much food, too much alcohol, much anything really, is one of the most easily preventable risks to the liver. A small amount of alcohol can help disperse clogged up qi, but too much will build up dampness and heat, and can cause symptoms like hangovers - dehydration. An orgasm can also disperse such clogged up qi, but too many too soon will wear you out and deplete your kidney essence (which most agree you will never get back…).

So in all things that deal with the liver moderation is the key. So when you get unnecessarily agitated or unreasonably snide, have a beer and touch yourself- you’ll feel better in no time. Just remember to keep it all in moderation.

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Contrary to popular belief, meditation is very easy and it isn’t just reserved for granola eating Trader Joe’s shoppers or little bald Asian men wearing orange robes and living in grand monasteries atop the ice capped mountains of China (or what ever Asian country you visualize when you stereotypically think of meditating monks; some people go with Japan, others Korea). Meditation is so easy, you may already be doing it regularly and not even knowing it.

First, I just want to say before I begin that the form of meditation I’ll first be talking about is a very simple form of meditation that is designed to prepare your mind for clarity.

When most people think about adding a regular habit of meditation to their day they think of meditation like how instructional sex videos talk about masturbating. As they setup some exclusive space for their deep and soul inspiring meditation session they hear a soft female voice instructing them to “close the door, lock it if you can”, “burn some incense or light some candles”, “make sure you won’t be interrupted”, etc. If you don’t hear this voice, it’s O.K., I’m still betting that if you’ve tried unsuccessfully to add meditation to your daily life before, you probably made a bit more of production of it than you needed to.

Meditating in 3 Easy Steps

• Step 1: Close your eyes or stare at something. Try to stare at something if you are surrounded by people, in fact try to stare at someone if you can.
• Step 2: Focus on your breathing. It doesn’t matter how you breath. In through your nose, out through your mouth, vice versa, or in and out through your nose or mouth. Just try and relax and breath deeply and steadily. Sometimes it helps to count your breaths.
• Step 3: Clear your mind. At some point you’ll find that you are naturally not focusing on your breathing and if that realization doesn’t cause you to start thinking about your breathing again you’re mind is pretty much clear.

Once you feel like your mind is clear, stay in this state for as long as you can. 2 seconds, 2 minutes, 2 hours, what ever. At first you won’t be able to hold it for long, but with practice you’ll be able to push further.

A lot of times it helps to set a designated amount of time aside to do this and to keep at it for the duration, but I think that setting up this time can be discouraging and can also lead to procrastinating. If you find that you can’t keep meditating for too long, you may want to force yourself into expanding the duration, but make sure it is a goal that won’t frustrate you.

The most important thing is to start small. You don’t have to meditate each day at first. Just try to consciously meditate as often as possible.

Kicking It Up a Notch

Once you’ve managed to meditate consistently for a good duration it’s time to spruce up the habit. In that sexual instruction video it would be the time to start adding oils, toys, and self-massage, but for meditation it is time to add visualization.

When I used to compete in track and field events my team would all warm-up and do stretches on the football field in the middle of the track. I was allergic to grass so instead I sat on the concrete next to the track and I meditated (I saved the stretching for before and after an event). While I meditated I visualized myself preparing for an event, I envisioned the starting gun being shot and me bursting out ahead of everyone and crossing the finishing line first. At first it was hit and miss, I won some and I lost some, but after awhile it became easier and easier to prepare my mind. Eventually I started to win more events and placed higher in the events I didn’t win. By the end of the track season I had a few more folks sitting with me on the concrete instead of out on the grass field before each competition.

Visualization such as this is another form of practicing or rehearsing your experiences and it works. The more you can visualize, the better the outcome will be. Worry about running into the CEO of your company in the elevator and being put on the spot to give the classic “30 seconds” speech about who you are? Meditate and visualize the encounter. Go through every possible outcome and prepare yourself for how you’ll handle it. Rehearse the same speech over and over again. If your chance encounter with the CEO ever happens you’ll feel like it has happened several times already and you’ll be able to shine.

There are other ways to kick up your meditation too. You can add another staple; the mantra. When you do this you focus on a phrase or word during meditation. Most often the mantra is repeated over and over again in the mind. Another thing you can do that is similar to a mantra is to focus on a small passage or story. When you do so, focus on what the story means to you, what its lessons are, and what its lesson might be that you aren’t seeing.

Once you are meditating regularly and adding visualization to your meditation you’ll find that you’ll have a lot less anxiety and far more peace of mind.

Anthony

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A student of Zen asks the master: “What is the secret to a peaceful life?” To which the master replies: “Eat when you’re hungry, and sleep when you’re tired.” “What? How is that not what we do every day?” “Actually, most people entertain a thousand desires while they eat and think about a thousand plans while they sleep.”

I know this to be very relevant in many of our lives…because I know who all of you are and what you think about when you eat…

Many of us are familiar with the concept of meditation: dismissing all the persistent thoughts of the day in order to clear the mind. Once the mind is clear you can use that capacity for whatever you choose.

When your mind is tired from constant use you may notice muddleheadedness, mental fatigue, lack of clarity of thoughts and speech, forgetfulness, nervousness, overwhelmed feelings, and other things that slow us down. Imagine how well you could attack a problem if you could only get calm and rational about it.

The body gets panicked sometimes too. Especially after an injury or trauma of some sort. The autonomic nervous system kicks in and the body prepares for a mad dash to save itself. So imagine how much faster you’d recover from a trauma if you presented the body with a clear and direct plan to get out of danger. To focus the body’s attention on the specific area or task that needs to be done to produce a healing result would prevent the waste of energy that would otherwise be spent physically panicking.

Practice meditating for a few minutes each day and you’ll find that not only will your mind feel clearer, but your body will feel much better too.

Brett

Excerpt from “How to Meditate & Visualize” [go to article]

Contrary to popular belief, meditation is very easy and it isn’t just reserved for granola eating Trader Joe’s shoppers or little bald Asian men wearing orange robes and living in grand monasteries atop the ice capped mountains of China (or what ever Asian country you visualize when you stereotypically think of meditating monks; some people go with Japan, others Korea). Meditation is so easy, you may already be doing it regularly and not even knowing it. […]

Read more about how to meditate and visualize here »

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Jeff & the Intersection
Jeff went to work every morning at the same time and always took the same route. Along this route was an intersection well-known for having a lot of people that have run red lights. There have been a couple times where Jeff had been considerably late due to accidents at the intersection.

No matter what color the lights were or if Jeff just sat through a red light he looked in all directions to check for someone running a red light before he passed through it. Each time he crossed the intersection he pondered to himself that there will be one day where he’ll forget to check and he’ll get hit. With each worried thought he began to think of worse possible situations that could occur if he forgot to check just once.

One day Jeff decided to tell his wife about his growing worries because he noticed that he was starting to obsess about the intersection. He was contemplating a call to a city official to complain about the intersection.

“Why don’t you just take the road one block over? It has less traffic and you’ll get to work faster.” His wife said.

At that moment Jeff realized that he was so worried and obsessed about the intersection he became blind to the easiest solution.

There are a few different classical Zen stories that I can think of that are similar in nature to this story and probably a lot more throughout other cultures.

In the story, Jeff’s worries helped him take practical precautionary steps to prevent an accident at the intersection, but his daily and narrowed focus on what was worrying him caused him to forget about other possible solutions available to him.

Worrying can be good, but when it is the first thought or emotion one has when a situation occurs it often is so distracting that they can’t get past it. Worries can be even more distracting if they are related to a past event or experience, especially one that was emotionally scarring.

The best way to confront your worries is to give them your attention quickly and pull the lessons you can learn from them, but as soon as you are done with the worry, push it away behind you and move forward. Sometimes the worry will continue to lurk and nag you, but don’t let it take you over. Once you are freed from the worry you’ll be able to see your situations much clearer.

I’m prone to going overkill worrying over situations similar to Jeff in the story. I think of all the possibilities of what could happen or what may have happened if I had done something different like forgetting to back out of my drive way slowly or double checking if the back door is locked. I worry that if I didn’t back out slowly I might get smashed by another car and I’ll be a sad toothless man like La Roche in “Adaptation” (click the link to see what I mean), or that if I don’t check my locks some insane guy like the janitor from “Unbreakable” will come in and take over my house after killing me.

With those types of worries where the possible outcomes are overblown or unlikely, sometimes it helps to remind yourself how improbable they are, but you should still take the practical precautions.

Worrying is so burdensome on the mind and the stress from the anxiety it causes can have ramifications mentally and physically. If something does happen to you, whether your worries saw it coming or if it completely blindsides you, you’re still going to have to deal with it. No amount of worrying will help you deal with what you have to do in the present. But more often than not, if you manage to put your worry aside, you’ll find another opportunity awaiting you.

Anthony

Brett’s Notes:
In Chinese medicine, when worry becomes consumptive, as with chronic anxiety, it is viewed as a problem with the stomach organ. When functioning properly the stomach is supposed to be the vessel that holds your food for your spleen* to transform into qi.

In an emotional sense, the function is the same; the stomach holds the ideas and thoughts and then delivers them to the spleen for transformation. When something is broken with this process, the thoughts stay in the stomach and work at you over and over and over. It begins to starve the spleen and in turn has an effect on the whole body.

* In western medicine the spleen is part of the immune/lymphatic system, but in traditional Chinese medicine it is the organ that performs the functions most traditionally associated with the digestive system, that of disassembling our food into fuels and amino acids.

Quotes Regarding Worry:
“If I had my life to live over, I would perhaps have more actual troubles but I’d have fewer imaginary ones.” - Don Herold

“Drag your thoughts away from your troubles… by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.” - Mark Twain

“Worrying is like a rocking chair, it gives you something to do, but it gets you nowhere.” - Glenn Turner

“Worry often gives a small thing a big shadow.” - Swedish Proverb

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Unsolicited advice is rare these days. We have decided to meet that desperate need with our own brand of detached, light-hearted humor and wealth of up-our-own-ass-knowledge.

My colleague and I are uniquely qualified to offer you suggestions because of our combined experience in areas of health, wellness and living. Together we have a combined lifetime experience of over 50 years. Perhaps many of you out there are older than that. You will undoubtedly know everything we have to offer and are welcome to stay for the humor.

I (Brett) am a licensed acupuncturist, currently too busy to practice, with a long — very long formal education in various Eastern philosophies–especially where it comes to living. My co-conspirator (Anthony) has enjoyed a lifetime of offering unsolicited advice. Together we are a force to be reckoned with. A power for disruption and marginal information unlike any which the world has ever seen!

We would like to provide you, our reader, with sage advice from two know-it-all guys who have trouble keeping our vast experience to ourselves. If you ever find it intimidating how much we know or can make up, rest assured, you’re not alone.

Brett

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